Ali Hazelwood’s Love, Theoretically (2023) brought this concept into the mainstream. The novel follows Elsie Hannaway, a theoretical physicist who moonlights as a fake girlfriend. In her day job, she quantifies the universe; in her side hustle, she commodifies love. The brilliance of the premise lies in its central conflict: Elsie uses theory to navigate the physical world—until she meets Jack, an experimental physicist who deals in hard data. The clash between the theoretical and the experimental becomes the engine of the romance. But why does this resonate so deeply with readers?
But the ultimate theorem of love is this:
The equations might look like this: [ \fracdRdt = aJ \quad \text(Romeo’s love grows when Juliet loves him) ] [ \fracdJdt = -bR \quad \text(Juliet’s love falls when Romeo loves her) ]
If you haven't picked up this STEMinist masterpiece yet, this is your sign. ⚛️🧡 Love Theoretically
Theoretical models break down at the quantum level of the human heart. Love is an emergent property—greater than the sum of its neurotransmitters, attachment styles, and matching coefficients. You can simulate it, graph it, and hypothesize about it, but the moment you touch it, the wave function collapses. You are no longer a theorist; you are a participant.
Love, Theoretically is lauded for its nuanced exploration of identity and professional struggle:
Robert Nozick, a 20th-century philosopher, proposed the idea of the "We." When two people love, they do not merely coexist; they form a new entity that shares a well-being. Theoretically, the "We" is an autonomous agent. To love is to voluntarily allow your autonomy to be subsumed by this new entity. The brilliance of the premise lies in its
In romantic terms, this is the transition from a "zero-sum game" (where one person wins and the other loses) to a cooperative game. Theoretically, love is an optimization problem. If Person A and Person B both compromise 10%, the theoretical yield of the relationship increases by 40%. It is a net positive.
The story centers on Elsie, an adjunct professor struggling with the exploitative nature of academia and the financial burden of managing Type 1 diabetes. To make ends meet, she works for a fake-dating service, where she uses her "Adaptive Personality Engineering" (APE) to become whatever her clients need.
Elsie Hannaway is the relatable protagonist we all needed. Watching her navigate the world of adjunct professing while balancing a secret side-gig as a fake girlfriend was both hilarious and heartbreaking. Jack Smith wasn't just a rival; he was the person who finally forced her to be honest with herself. But the ultimate theorem of love is this:
You cannot prove love exists. You cannot point to a specific neuron or a specific equation and say, "There it is." But you know when you feel it. The theoretical framework gives you language, but the experience gives you meaning.
: The book also features diabetes representation, adding another layer of lived reality to Elsie’s character. Love, Theoretically | Chicago Public Library
Decoding the Physics of Romance: An In-Depth Look at Love, Theoretically